It isn’t very often I free form, pretending I am writing in a journal that no one will see including myself rereading it, but a year ends and waxing poetic calls to me. I am not always quick to ponder the past year, but today I find myself looking back at ol’ ’17 as if to say ‘it’s time for you to go dang it!’
I do see that with more age comes better perspective. Most people may not respond after this years events as I would. Knowing I had to leave a group of friends and getting laid off within weeks of each other. I am surprised how much freer I am after both events. Yes, it took some healing time and willingness for true perspective, but now it is taken care of instead of an open wound. It feels now like I am grateful for it all in spite of it’s harshness, but glad it is finished too! I had to stomp my boots on the rose colored glasses I wore in regards to the old friends and be honest about my old job that it wasn’t near my heart’s desire regardless. I have long believed that God does not bring me to anything that He cannot carry me through.
In 2017 I come away with two big things about God and His nature. 1.) Sometimes I must allow Him to do hard things that are creating my good! 2.) He is truly always good regardless of my perspective at the time. So I realize that losing something that I thought was great for me is Him doing good. I don’t know about you, but I would rather hurt temporarily to avoid a continual cycle of dysfunction!!! I look forward to another year of learning about the relationship between God and myself.